A Dream is a wish your heart makes....

Most of my friends know that I am a big believer in the ability of our dreams to help us dissect certain aspects of our lives. And last night I had a really crazy one! I was so moved by it that when I came to work I started looking up what the different moments in the dream could have represented and as the pieces came together I started getting goose bumps by how accurate it all was. So I'd like to share it with you now but I'm going to summarize it a little so that this post wont be extremely long!

Okay, so, I dreamed last night that I met a guy at John Green's book signing on Saturday (which I didn't but the book signing was still amazing!!!). I was sitting out on this paved walkway in front of a hospital with him, and we were talking and flirting and smiling and blushing. Finally I turn to the guy (let's just call him Guy because in my dream he didn't have a name), and I say "Okay, I'm just going to say it, I like you. I don't know how you feel about me, but I like you." 

The next thing I know the dream has fast forward and Guy is all the way across this field (a dried up Oklahoma kind of field) that leads to the parking lot for the hospital and he is talking to this group of people. I'm devastated! I just told him that I liked him and he ran away! Then all of a sudden he has his fists up pumping the air and shouting "She Likes Me!"

And of course, I'm ecstatic, but Oh No, out of nowhere my nose starts bleeding (which in real life happens all the time!), and I mean it is gushing!!! So I jump up and run into the hospital. I can't find where to go to get tissue but I find a door so I run inside. Once inside I realize that it is a nursery filled with just rows of babies. The nurses help me get cleaned up, but I'm in there for a while and I know Guy is worried. 

Finally, I open the door and Guy is leaning against the wall next to the door with his back to me, and he is talking to John Green! I see that behind John Green there is this big bathroom and I remember thinking that I couldn't believe it was there all along. But, anyways, I reach out for Guy and put my arm around him. He looked down at me all concerned and asked if I was okay and I was like "Yeah, I had a quick problem but I'm good now." then I turned to John Green and was like "Oh My God You Are John Green!!!" And we talked for a bit and John told Guy that he liked me and approved highly of me. Then Guy and I kissed and I was really happy, like deliriously warm kind of a happy.

And then I woke up. 

So, What does this all mean?

Hospitals = seeking help with physical/mental health

Dried up Fields = pessimism and jaded prospects

Blood = being emotionally drained

Bloody nose = feeling like your character is being attacked

Nurseries = regressing back to your old self

So the first interesting thing is that I dreamed I told a guy I liked him and then I assumed that he ran across a field to get away from me when really he was going to tell people how happy he was. That was very pessimistic of me! But that is what I assume all the time! And it is that pessimism that I am trying to change (or attack) now!

The other interesting part, is that I am on this journey of change (which is attacking my pessimism) and I am seeking help (which is why I ran into the hospital) my fear is that I will regress back to my old ways (which explains the nursery) and it is going to take sometime (which was represented by how long I was behind the door making Guy worry). 

But then I opened the door to find him waiting for me. I noticed the bathroom (which represents that I had another option all along but I just couldn't see it and chose to run to the nursery) and in that moment when I had my past behind me (nursery) and a different path across from me (bathroom), what did I do? I reached out to Guy. In the end, I chose him.

And John Green approved!